High chance the fella was taking viagra too….

Ltos of guys in the swinger world take Viagra to be rock hard and go multiple founds, and also use numbing sprays to not cum quickly. Now the dominance part is something else you could improve in yourself ofcourse if you're interested

Well that probably didn't help your confidence =\ First, bear in mind that for a lot of couples this is practically a sport, and for men that's the payoff; strength, stamina, confidence. Second, I wing sugarcoat it, sexual "mishaps" like this can do a number on your confidence. All I can really suggest is try not to dwell on it, and rack up some wins. Third, bear in mind you were both in a new and exciting situation. She was probably feeling a lot like you, except there's nothing "embarrassing" about a woman cumming quickly. Fourth, I can almost guarantee you he was using dick pills. Even if you don't need them, they're a good idea for this kind of thing, especially if you want to go multiple rounds. And you don't need to upend your entire personality just to be more confident in bed. The simplest steps IMO: Don't ask, tell. Don't be afraid to manhandle and toss her around. The trick to not feeling like/being an asshole about it? Stick to things you already know she likes! If she had a good time with this guy, you already have a pretty good idea of how far is too far, so work up to that. Don't ask her if she'd like to maybe switch to a position you know good and god damn well she enjoys, just put her in that position. Something new where you're not as sure? Same energy, but if she's not into it, ask if she's ok, and pivot to something tried and true if she's good. Don't stifle the grunts and roars you feeling building up inside you. Dirty talk, tell her how good she makes you feel, how much you love fucking her, whatever's in your heart. If you say something she doesn't like, apologize and don't say it again. Don't think, just act. White-knuckle those hips, slam into her like a vending machine that owes you money, whatever works, just do it. Don't give second thoughts a chance to form, listen to your instincts. Confidence wins, and wins build confidence. It's a feedback loop, but you gotta get the ball rolling first. A little bit of the singing tip "loud and proud" for the bedroom, taken as literally a you please. 😂

First times are always full of challenges. Comfort comes with experience. But I also want to address your "I couldn't compete" comment: it's not a competition. Every partner brings something different to the table. He brings something that maybe you don't, but you surely bring things that he doesn't. And if the goal is your partner's pleasure, you and the other guy are teammates— not competitors. I'd encourage you to reframe it in your mind. Seeing it as competition will mess with your head and almost ensure a negative experience.