Went to an orgy with my husband, now i'm traumatized

Oct 18, 2025

cuipingcheng

(31F) happily married with beautiful healthy kids, but this housewife life doesn't allow for much sexual activity. so both me and my husband has been struggling with the frustration for a while now.
so recently he found an event that was almost an orgy? and suggested we go check it out. tbh we have never done these stuff and we havent had much sex outside of marriage so it was very new, but with the frustration pent up i just agreed without a second thought.
we went there a while ago and it was bigger than i thought, and with all the atmosphere that is going on and the drinks, one thing let to another and i ended up sleeping with too many people. although it was consensual both on my side and my husbands, i feel like at the heat of the moment i didnt realize that i was doing too much.
it was only after i sobered up that i realized what i had done.
and eversince then, i cant stop feeling guilt even tho i know it might seem that i didnt do anything wrong. it is my maternal side and also the religious side that kinda makes me want to be this perfect pure mother and is disgusted by what i did.
so im confused if i should accept that side and be ok with it, or just forget it and move on and never do it again.
the confusion is mind bugging so any advice is appreciated

Top Comments:

Intense experience that has high dopamine, serotonin, all of the feeling chemicals involved, will have a come down afterwards. Factor in religious guilt, societal guilt, all that, and it's a lot to sort through. You need to give it time, let your feelings settle.

Mothers have sex. In fact, the vast majority of mothers became mothers because they had sex! It's integral to being a mom. No one is "pure". It's a bullshit word made up to control people. You don't need to go to another orgy, it doesn't sound like it's for you, but work on letting go of the idea that moms aren't sexual beings. A mother is just one role you play in your life. You have more layers than just "mom". You don't cease to be a sexual being just because you've given birth and are raising children. It's such a toxic burden that we put on women and we have to really look at those ideas in ourselves and deconstruct them.

It was a learning experience. There is no shame in sex. It's very important to process this with your husband. Set some boundaries together for next time if there is one.

You should just feel like it's another step in life, so it wasn't for you🤷♂️ it wasn't ours the first time either

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