Deep Sex Guide: 20 Positions for Maximum Intimacy and Pleasure
Deep Sex: More Than Just Penetration
Deep sex isn't just about physically penetrating or being penetrated as deeply as possible—it can also be about making sex feel more intimate and bonding; like you're trying to experience as much of each other as you possibly can. "There's something particularly erotic about taking your lover all the way inside of you," says Jodie Milton, women's sex and intimacy coach at Practical Intimacy. "Letting someone in that physically deep requires trust, vulnerability, and deep surrender, which can lead to deeper emotional intimacy and connection between you, too."
Plus, deep sex can feel really good, stimulating spots like the upper wall of the vagina and the A-spot (the anterior fornix erogenous zone). "Deep penetration positions are a great way to experience a different kind of sexual enjoyment," says Milton. "If you tend to be clit focused (valid), there's a whole smorgasbord of new pleasure zones to explore within the vagina."
Often, with deep penetration comes cervical stimulation, especially if an XL penis or strap-on is involved—which, for many, can feel more intense when they're highly aroused and their oxytocin and adrenaline levels are rising. "Pressure against the cervix can (for some) be highly arousing and lead to intense orgasmic response," says Jess O'Reilly, PhD, sex expert at Astroglide. But because everyone is different, cervical pressure can also be uncomfortable for some, so pay attention to your body and take your time switching to deeper positions until you're highly aroused, says O'Reilly.
There can also be such thing as too deep, especially if you experience endometriosis, have an inverted uterus, or any other condition that makes deep penetration painful. In this case, go slowly and make sure you're aroused, wet, and relaxed, says Milton. Ease into it and use tons of lube. You can also try shifting your position, or integrating a product like the OhNut on the penis-owner or dildo to reduce the depth of penetration, recommends Heather Jeffcoat, DPT, former president of the Academy of Pelvic Health Physical Therapy. A thick penis ring works, too.
If deep penetration still isn't quite working for you, feel free to switch to something more comfortable. Not every sex-having person needs to master every sex position—different strokes work for different folks, and there's nothing wrong with focusing on what you know works for you.
When/if you're ready to explore deep penetration, we put together this list of 20 deep sex positions for maximum arousal. Go forth and conquer!
20 Deep Sex Positions
-
The Speed Bump
Enlist the help of an exercise ball to help you go extra deep with the Speed Bump. It's like doggy style with a little extra bounce.
How to do it: The receiver lies on their stomach, draping themselves over a fitness ball. The giver enters from behind, either lying on their partner's back or kneeling. (It also works with the receiver flipped over with their back draped over the ball.)
Make it hotter: Harness the powers of the ball. Rock it back and forth or see if you can get a sexy undulation going—the ball will throw in a few moves of its own.
-
Reverse Wheelbarrow
This variation can be challenging, but if you're feeling brave, it can give you the kind of deep penetration you crave. (And if you're the receiver, possibly a head rush. Proceed with caution.)
How to do it: The receiver lies on their back. The giver lifts the receiver up by their butt and stands, holding the receiver's hips to penetrate. The receiver holds themselves up on their hands and wraps their feet around the giver's neck. It's like wheelbarrow, but the receiver is facing up instead of down and their legs are up around their partner's neck instead of on either side of their body.
Make it hotter: Deep penetration can mean anal sex too. If you want to take the A-train, this position works especially well for it. Make sure you use all the lube going in.
-
The Titanic
Switch up the angle on your basic missionary by having the penetrating partner hold themselves up with straight arms. "Their back is extended—like a design on the bow of the front of a ship," says Jeffcoat.
How to do it: The receiving partner lies on their back, knees bent and feet flat on the ground. The penetrating partner bends their knees and holds themselves up with their arms straight.
Make it hotter: Adjust this to your whims. If things get too deep, the receiver can bend their knees as a buffer. Not deep enough? Then have the receiver swing their legs over the penetrating partner's shoulders.
-
Couch Worship
Take advantage of your consenting couch by having the receiving partner kneel before it, fully supporting the top half of their body on the cushion, recommends Jeffcoat. This gives the receiver a soft place to hold onto to and a buffer for harder thrusting.
How to do it: The receiver kneels in front of the couch, with the top half of their body draped over the cushion. The penetrating partner kneels behind them for modified doggy.
Make it hotter: "The giving partner has their hands free to hold around the receiving partner's hips," says Jeffcoat. If they want to hold a clit-sucking toy with those free hands, all the better.
-
The Sit and Get
This is another one where the couch comes in handy. "The giving partner has access to the clitoris, breasts, and other sensitive areas," says Jeffcoat.
How to do it: The receiving partner lies back on the couch cushion while the penetrating partner kneels on the floor.
Make it hotter: To go deeper, the receiver can wrap their legs around their partner's hips and pull them in deeper. Add a few consensual spankings if necessary.
-
The Flatiron
The Flatiron is an extra cozy position where you can feel connected without the potential for too much eye contact. The closer the receiver's legs are together, the tighter things will feel for both of you.
How to do it: This is like a flat version of doggy style. The receiver lies flat on their belly and the giver enters from behind, either vaginally or anally—up to you!
Make it hotter: Prop a wand vibrator on a pillow under the receiver's hips to ride the vibes.
-
The Seashell
The receiver might need to be flexible for the seashell, but they can bend their legs to make it easier. This position can be deep deep, so start slow.
How to do it: The receiver lies on their back then lifts their legs by their ears. The giver kneels, leaning over to enter.
Make it hotter: The giver has easy access for kissing and sucking the receiver's toes. Use this power for good.
-
The Self Control
You don't need another person to experience deep penetration if you enlist the help of a dildo with a suction cup. "Get a large dildo that attaches itself to your wall. Put a bunch of lube on it and have complete control of how deep and fast you're penetrated," says Niki Davis-Fainbloom, a sex educator and fetish expert.
How to do it: Stick the dildo on a wall and back onto it, à la doggy style.
Make it hotter: Try it with a partner. "If you give your partner oral sex while riding the dildo, you may ride yourself to the moon and not return!" says Davis-Fainbloom.
-
The Leapfrog
"This position is similar to child's pose in yoga, and allows you to both physically relax and emotionally open. Your partner can either stand or kneel behind you," says Milton.
How to do it: The receiver gets on all fours, props a few pillows under their chest, then lowers their chest to rest on the pillows. The giver kneels behind to enter.
Make it hotter: The receiver can get more by stimulation by putting a lube-y hand between their body and the pillow and humping their hand.
-
The Cervical O
According to relationship expert Kim Anami, if you're trying for a cervical orgasm, the best position is doggy style. "It's best to warm up with some other sexual positions first and then ease into cervical penetration—which is actually just rubbing up against the cervix," Anami previously told Cosmopolitan. "Even then, I suggest going slow and really opening and relaxing the cervix as you go. Because it's such an intense and vulnerable experience, it's not likely to happen during casual sex or if you aren't feeling close to your partner. You have to be in a place where you feel very open, safe, and relaxed."
How to do it: The receiver gets on their hands and knees in doggy style. The giver kneels to enter from behind.
Make it hotter: The giver can help the receiver relax—and be more receptive to an orgasm—by talking them through it. They can use words of love or filthiness—whatever gets you two going. Even better if they lean in close and whisper in the receiver's ear.
-
The Soup Spoon
"Spooning is extra delicious because of the maximum skin contact. It can feel very intimate and can help create the surrender and relaxation necessary for deep penetration. And it's super comfortable too," says Milton. And yes, you actually can achieve the depth you want—put a pillow under your hips for the optimal angle.
How to do it: One person lies on their side with the other behind them facing the same direction. The little spoon puts a pillow under their hips.
Make it hotter: The little spoon can masturbate with a vibrator or hand the vibrator to the big spoon for a reach-around.
-
The Wide Cowgirl
Think: Elevated cowgirl position. "This one's great, because you're on top and in full control. Widen your legs for a deeper feel and grind your hips down as deep as you want to go," says Milton.
How to do it: The giver lies on their back. The receiver straddles their partner like cowgirl but widens their legs to take it even deeper. (Bonus: The wider stance adds more direct clit stim.)
Make it hotter: Since everyone's hands are occupied, try a cock ring for hands-free stimulation.
-
The Private Dancer
Play with the sexiness of a lap dance with an in-home version. Start with grinding, remove layers of clothing as you go until you can't take it anymore. "Any position where the receiving partner is on top can work well for deeper penetration, as they can control the angle and rhythm," says O'Reilly.
How to do it: One person sits on a chair or the edge of the bed and the other straddles atop, facing them.
Make it hotter: The person on top can work the lap dance angle by staying by donning some crotchless lingerie.
-
The Lotus
This is a classic Tantra position to enhance intimacy, and the deep penetration is an extra bonus. Move together slowly and sensually as you gaze into each other's eyes.
How to do it: The giver sits with their legs crossed. The receiver sits on the giver's lap, facing them, and wraps their legs around the giver's hips.
Make it hotter: If you're working with two vulvas, you can add a double dildo for simultaneous penetration.
-
The Happy Baby
This is just like the happy baby yoga pose, but with sex. The receiver is spread wide open so this position accentuates the elements of surrender and submission. Take that vibe as far as you want.
How to do it: The receiver lies on their back with their legs bent and holds their feet in their hands. The giver kneels over them to enter.
Make it hotter: If you want to make it a little more BDSM-y, the receiver can use a spreader bar to keep them exactly where the giver wants them. (Requires consent and pre-negotiated boundaries.)
-
The Deep Impact
Take a sideways approach for a whole new way of experiencing each other. If you're working with a curved penis, this is a great way to embrace that curve.
How to do it: The receiver lies on their side and lifts one leg up. The giver straddles the receiver's leg, entering from a kneeling position.
Make it hotter: Add in some CBD-based arousal oil. The giver fills their hand with lube and cups their partner's vulva, adding a long smooth rub to every thrust.
-
The Wheelbarrow
If the receiver has some upper-arm strength and is up for a challenge, give the Wheelbarrow a try. It's like the grade school wheelbarrow game, but naked. If things get too crazy, or the receiver just can't hold themselves up, they can lie face down with their hips at the edge of the bed while the giver lifts the receiver's legs to get to perfect penetration height.
How to do it: The receiver gets in the wheelbarrow position holding their weight with arms straight out to the floor while their partner holds up their legs and enters standing from behind.
Make it hotter: It's okay to be weird and silly during sex. Can you walk to the bedroom in the wheelbarrow? Maybe this is your new form of sex transportation.
-
Rolling in the Deep
If you haven't already discovered this way to take missionary much, much deeper, give this tweak a try. Using a pillow, angle the receiver's hips to take this pose to a much deeper place. Try more pillows to explore variations.
How to do it: Assume the missionary position. with a pillow or two propped under the receiver's hips. The receiver lifts their legs straight up and over their partner's shoulders.
Make it hotter: If the giver holds onto the receiver's legs and pushes them back toward their head (only slightly, the receiver's not made of rubber here), they'll hit spots deep on the top of the vaginal wall that'll feel so. damn. good.
-
The Bitilasana, Baby
Bitilasana (aka, the cow position in yoga) is not only a good way to stretch your back, but far more importantly, it's the surest way to get the giver all the way inside.
How to do it: The receiver gets on all fours doggy-style, but exaggerates the arch of their back so their hips are tipped up.
Make it hotter: The receiver can get an even deeper feel by pushing their body back with their hands to take the giver in further or they can rotate their hips to play with the angle
-
The Extra Mile
Another fun (and I do mean fun) way to play with depth is throwing yourself over the arm of the couch and angling your hips up even higher. Let them hold up your legs while they watch themselves enter you. Game over.
How to do it: The receiver lies back on the couch with their hips over the arm of the couch. The giver stands to enter, holding on to the receiver's legs.
Make it hotter: Want to try it anally? The receiver just flips over, butt in the air, and ready to go.
