my bf is suddenly insecure about his penis size & it’s ruining our rel – Adorime
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my bf is suddenly insecure about his penis size & it’s ruining our relationship

Oct 07, 2025

cuipingcheng

i (26f) have been with my bf (32m) for 6 months. he's the first/only person i've slept with. due to a bunch of issues in my past, i had just never trusted anyone enough til i met him

with the context out of the way, here's the issue - about 6 weeks ago we were talking casually, and he got curious about how i used to satisfy myself before i met him. i told him i'd mostly use toys, and because he kept asking for details, i looked up my vibrator/dildo on the website i bought them from and showed him

i didn't think anything of it but he got kind of quiet after that and looked at the product page on my phone for a long time before handing it back to me. then he made a comment about the dildo's size and how 'big' it was. i still wasn't thinking anything of it and just shrugged it off like 'it's not that big,' because it was really nothing crazy

long story short, it turns out the dildo i used to use when i was a virgin was 0.8 inches longer and 0.5 inches thicker than him. he checked. and as a result, he's convinced himself there's no way i feel satisfied with his penis. i feel bad because it seems to have affected his confidence, but i'm also annoyed because i've never done anything to imply i'm disappointed with his size. the way he acts in bed has changed now and it feels like he's trying to over-compensate by being rougher/more 'dominant.' i've already spoken to him about it but it feels like things will never go back to the way they were before and idk what to do


Top Comments:

I don't want to tell you what to do but I had a similar experience with my ex. He was always insecure about his size and he made jokes about it. I told him multiple times and assured him in many different ways that I am satisfied and that I don't appreciate his jokes on himself. Nothing, literally nothing, worked. He was projecting that onto every aspect of our relationship. I just got really fed up.
I mean I don't know what you've said to him thus far but but I think you need to be very blunt. I was very happy with our sex before now I'm not happy with it. I no longer feel like I'm having sex with a loving partner but someone who is trying to prove something. Things like that. You may or may not, depending on how serious it is, want to say Are you really going to let something I never even noticed ruin our relationship. If he can't move past this he may need to go to therapy and figure out why it's so upsetting to him. Sorry if I sound mean but dudes 32 not 16, he should be more than mature enough not to be threatened by a very slightly bigger toy.
The 0.8 and 0.5 can be mitigated rather swiftly through various arousal techniques, though who's measuring during that fun? 🤩
The fact he measured it down to a decimal point is crazy. It's not even a whole inch. He's acting insane and I suggest not having sex with him anymore until he agrees to stop being so rough with you.

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