How to Have Online Sex: 14 Tips to Stay Close When You’re Apart

Being long-distance from your partner doesn't mean you can't still get it on — it just means you have to get creative. The COVID-19 pandemic gave us more tools and practice when it comes to connecting at a distance, but just like physical sex, there is meh, good, and great video sex. Whether you use FaceTime, Zoom, Signal, Skype, or the video call button on your phone, there are plenty of ways to get close when you're not physically together.

When you're in a long-distance relationship or separated from your partner, it's normal to miss physical closeness and simple things like holding hands or cuddling. If you're apart for work, travel, family reasons, or quarantining, technology can help you, uh… come together.

Mutual masturbation sessions over Zoom, Skype, FaceTime, or your preferred video platform allow you to make eye contact, see their body, hear their voice, and imagine being closer. It also opens the door to some sexy play that creates memories and leaves you both satisfied.

Here are 14 tips for long-distance hookups, better video sex, and keeping the fire alive when you're apart.

1. Safety First

• Use a dedicated, anonymous, or encrypted account for video sex or sharing nudes.
• Choose platforms with end-to-end encryption whenever possible.
• Check privacy settings, and confirm whether your partner plans to record or screenshot.
• Establish boundaries and consent before starting.
• Decide whether you'll show your face, genitals, or both — each has different privacy risks.

2. Start with Sexting

Sexting is the foreplay of socially distanced sex. Try:

• Flirting throughout the day before your video session.
• Sending sexy emojis or pictures.
• Sharing short voice clips using your bedroom voice.
• Sending short teaser videos.

3. Watch a Romantic or Erotic Movie Together

Use watch-party tools or simply sync up a movie and press play together. Pause when things get hot and turn your attention to each other.

4. Schedule a Virtual Date & Hookup Session

Dress up, meet at a set time, and start with something casual — a meal, drinks, or coffee — just like an in-person date. Let things move naturally toward sex afterward.

5. Decide What (Not) to Wear

Wear something that makes you feel sexy or something your partner likes. You can plan a slow strip, or surprise each other by starting nude under a blanket or towel.

6. Send a Toy or Item of Clothing to Your Partner

Mail them a surprise toy or lingerie to use during your next session. Do an on-camera unboxing to see their reaction and explore the possibilities together.

7. Set the Stage for Your Virtual Hookup

• Think about lighting, angles, music, makeup, and the background.
• Use LED mood lights, candles (or LED candles), and sexy playlists.
• Remove anything unsexy — like dirty laundry — from the frame.
• Use a virtual background for privacy if needed.
• Decide if you're showing your face, body, or both.

8. Find Your Inner Domme: Tell Each Other What to Do

Virtual sex is a great time to explore dominance, submission, and giving each other specific tasks — like where to touch, how fast, what to remove, and what toys to use.

9. Dirty Talk

• Narrate how you're touching yourself.
• Describe what you'd do to your partner if they were there.
• Share fantasies and make plans for your next in-person session.

10. Take a Bath Simultaneously

Bathing on video gives you a natural reason to be naked while keeping some parts submerged. Use bubbles for coverage, or introduce a showerhead or waterproof toy for extra fun.

11. Touch Yourself

Long-distance sex is about touching yourself while being watched. Explore what feels good — slow build or fast and intense — and try different lubes or toys to discover new sensations.

12. Use a Sex Toy on Yourself

Incorporate toys like sleeves, dildos, or vibrators. Let your partner direct how you use them. You can also both use the same type of toy and mirror each other's movements.

13. Play Sexy Games Together

• Strip poker, Never Have I Ever, Truth or Dare, or customized sexy challenges.
• Roleplay characters from movies, books, or fantasies.
• Do stripteases — alternate, sync them, or toss clothing at the camera.

14. Virtual Cuddles and Afters

After you both come, don't rush to hang up. Stay for pillow talk, appreciation, or reading together. Or, if you prefer, agree to end the call afterward — just communicate your preference with your partner.