[FM] Silent agreement with the massage therapist

I'm 27F been weightlifting for a couple of years now and attending pole dance classes for almost a year. This led to a bunch of physical stress on my body, I used to ignore it until I had a bad strain on my ass 6 months ago which left me almost not being able to walk. Was super depressed because I was really passionate about it.

My partner, (yes, I had a partner during this time, don't judge me please) suggested me to find somebody that can treat it, I wasn't in the best moment money wise during that time. So, it had to be something that I could afford and everywhere I looked it was super expensive. So, a girlfriend told me to book an appointment with a masseuse that worked with her mom, she told me that the guy knew her and it would be affordable, also the guy was like super good at what he did.

I messaged the guy, from his profile picture he looked like he was in his 40s, good looking, was super nice and turned out he coached my softball team when I was a kid. We hit it off super fast and it was like I knew him my whole life. Everything seemed great, no red flags. I explained him my economic situation and told him I couldn't afford going to the center so he told me he could visit my place since it wouldn't be too far from where he lived and if I had a big enough space for his table he could handle it, which I did. I also told him I could probably afford some sessions short term, but couldn't afford paying him months in advance. He agreed and it was all good.

My partner and I were super happy that I was getting the attention that I needed, he made sure I had the couch for it, ready and everything. The mom of my partner was staying with us during that time so we decided to have the table set up in the garage where I would be able to have privacy and don't bother her while watching tv in the living room which was the only thing she did.

First massage session arrived, and the dude was way bigger than I remember, huge and muscular, was just as good looking. I was super impressed, I think I blushed a bit. I stood there for an extra 2 or 3 seconds looking at him at the door, he gave me a big hug, that felt like I was a tiny thing and, I hugged him back and introduced him to my partner, he saw the game in the tv and they straight up started talking about baseball.

Everything was ready to start, he told me to undress the bottom area, he told me I could stay with a bra since he was just going to focus on the glutes, and put myself face down on the table and cover myself with the sheets he left there while he waited outside. I did and told him he could come back when I was ready. He ask me if it was ok to close the door, I told him it was. We were talking about what happened, I explained I was going at it too hard and his comment was "its been paying off huh?" while tapping my ass over the sheets which made both of us laugh. Gotta say I'm like usually shy so I avoid confrontation, it felt friendly so I didn't say anything. I don't know but it made my ass cheeks jiggle so freely because I had no undies that almost felt like a spank with those big hands. And I got to confess spanks get me 200% wet, so that was a bad way to open if I wanted to keep my cool, I got nervous after that because I was feeling things down there.

The massage started, he was super polite and gentle, his hands felt like I was being massage by a giant. He grabbed my ass cheeks and always asked if it was ok to touch around there, he was mostly massaging the muscles around it including my thighs too because I told him I felt pain there too. almost felt sleep a couple of times. It was amazing, he used oils and made my body feel super relax, I never had a massage session before, so it was all new to me. First massage session was done, I told him how good it felt. Already felt way better and then. We set up a second appointment and it was a done deal.

Couldn't believe how relieved I felt, my partner was happy for me too. I have to say during this time, sex was pretty scarce and not exciting, I don't know if it was him being stressed with work or my injury, but something made it feel super dull.

Second and third session were amazing, Fourth session comes, this is where things took a sharp turn, that day my partner took his mom shopping and I was home alone. I received him, same thing big hug and then garage. By this point I knew the whole process, He tells me to undress, but tells me to remove the bra this time so he can massage my back this time too. So, I was waiting for him to leave while I undress, but this time he told me to undress while he was setting up his bag and the table.

So, I stood there processing what was happening, me being 0 confrontational, started to undress and hopped on the table in front of him. I felt my face turning red and I felt exposed, and he was like staring at me, but he def could see me going almost nude in front of him. I tried to grab the sheet and he didn't unpack it. I asked for it and he told me, "Whoops forgot" "Do you need it?" and I just quietly said no, that it was ok. So we basically started the massage with my butt naked. Everything seemed normal, he massaged the usual areas and my back this time, but then he went down and massage my ass cheeks in what felt a different way, my inner thighs which was somewhere he never really focused on. And he did this fast slapping thing across my ass cheeks that started to turn me on and while he was moving my ass cheeks, I felt my pussy drip and ooze.

He went back to my inner thighs brushing his fingers on my pussy and my butthole, I'm sure he noticed how wet I was and he pretended to massage around the area and my thighs but he kept going back at it, until I felt his fingers like touching my clit and almost going in my pussy. But he kept like "massaging". I felt I was getting close to the climax. I orgasmed hard like I've never have before, my whole body trembled, I tried to control my body, but a moan escaped my mouth. I felt my face and my pussy super hot. It felt amazing, but I also felt incredible guilty. He stopped a little bit after that and told me it was all set with a small spank on my ass cheeks.

He acted like nothing happened, even asked me if everything was fine while I was trying to bring myself up after that orgasm. I noticed he had a huge hard on, but like I said, he acted like nothing was going on and I was too shy to say. So, I just acted like nothing happened too, It was easier.

I felt so bad after that, it was making me feel super guilty that fact that I came so hard and that I enjoyed it, not only that but I started to touch myself thinking about it. And when I had sex with my partner I thought about it too. I didn't know what to do. But next appointment was set, I was so so fucking anxious, mixed of having this guy that made me have the best orgasm of my life back and also him trying to go for it while my partner was home. But, he didn't, at all. It was a regular session, he even left while I was undressing. He stopped where he usually stopped. I was relieved, but at the same time disappointed, was so conflicted about it. Made me feel even worst that I felt like that.